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An Angel Named Hope

By Joseph R. Pabich


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Dirk Summer took a long swig from his beer, then neatly put the bottle down on the end table on top of a coaster. Tomorrow, he will be sitting alone in front of the idiot box for the second Valentine's Day in a row. He sighs aloud, "well, I guess people really do come into your life for only three reasons." "For a reason, a season, or a lifetime." "And I guess she was only in my life for a season." "Ah well" he says to himself with a sheepish grin, "at least I don't have to worry about how this place looks".

Dirk was depressed. Nothing seemed to be going his way lately. Not for a long time. Ever since the one lady he truly loved left him just over a year ago, his outlook on life was particularly cynical. He had somehow driven her away, instead of building her up. Instead of helping to build their relationship together. But then, how long did he think a moke like him could make it last with a woman like her?

She tried to help him… had told him that he had problems buried within himself that affected his behavior. She told him he had a lot of fear in him and that he didn't know how to deal with it. He didn't wanted to believe that he had some kind of personality disorder. He also did not believe that he behaved poorly towards her, and that when he came home from a rough day on the police force, things at his home should go his way. He did not see any indication that things were wrong. He had not picked up the signals that she was not happy with him anymore. Of course, everyone knows that it's the little things that kill, like not really communicating with your mate. Therefore, this had been their relationship's demise.

Ha! Some detective he was, not knowing things were shaky at home; he couldn't fine-tune his detective work from the job to help him in his personal life.

Dirk never made time to really listen to what advice his ex had tried to give him. He was always too prolifically involved in his own thoughts; about the job mostly. When he finally got around to thinking about what help she could offer, it was too late for them. Looking back, he remembered other people giving him similar advice as well. You see, Dirk was an intense human being. His thoughts were often focused on finding perpetrator. He also would often have negative thoughts, not knowing why they would pop into his head.

Dirk passed out from exhaustion in his rocking chair before he could make it to his bed.

He arose about 4:00 a.m., as he usually did when he passed out on the chair, with a nagging pain in his lower back. "I really should try to make it to the bed from now on," he thought to himself. At 5:00 a.m. he entered the 16th Precinct where he worked and set his coffee on his desk. He sat down and noticed a card on his desk with a little piece of paper taped to it. The piece of paper looked like a fortune from a fortune cookie. Someone had taken the time to save this little tidbit of advice from their lunch the day before and tape it to the front of one of the precinct cards. The card had no name on it; it was one of those generic 16th Precinct phone number cards.

The fortune said, "Your outlook on life directly affects your happiness."

"Wow!" Dirk said aloud. "Gonna have to use my detective skills first thing in the morning and find out who left this here, he he."

As the day progressed, it became increasingly difficult for Dirk to concentrate. He was preoccupied all day thinking about the Chinese fortune. Who had left it? Was his "outlook on life" really that poor for someone to take it upon himself to take action? In addition to Dirk's anxiety about the fortune, the homicides he was investigating presently were particularly grisly. This depressed him further.

At the end of the day, Dirk's mind and body were tired. He decided to have just one beer with his meal in front of the television set, then go to bed While he was lying on his back in bed thinking over the events of his life, he started dozing. As he was about to shut his eyes, he caught a glimpse of light to his right, by the window. Dirk closed his eyes, opened them, and fixed them at the window. There, he thought he saw a small greenish glowing ball of light, floating just above the windowsill. Dirk blinked, thinking that he was just overtired and seeing things. When he opened his eyes, the small (about 2 inches in diameter) glowing orb was directly above his head, hovering near the ceiling.

Dirk did not become frightened, for he sensed a warm quality emanating from the ball of light. Dirk heard a calm, female voice call his name, "Dirk." He did not hear this with his ears, he heard the calm voice in his mind. He became slightly startled at this, and he answered, not aloud, but somewhat telepathically "yes?" "Who or what is this?" He received no immediate answer. He closed his eyes, but just as he did, he heard the beautiful soft voice say his name once more.

He opened his eyes. The ball of light was still there. He knew that somehow the light was speaking to him. The light silently spoke these words to him:

"Dirk, I am here to help you. Your thoughts are making you and the people that care about you sick, and this is not necessary."

Dirk asked, "Who are you?"

Light: "I am an angel."

"I don't believe in angels."

Dirk could hear light, musical laughter in his mind. It sounded very beautiful to him. The angel did not have to put words to the laughter. The laughter inferred many things to Dirk at once, but mainly that being stubborn was foolish. Dirk laughed light-heartedly at himself, in spite of himself. He was now filled with a comforting knowledge that a divine visit, for whatever reason, was upon him. This feeling was almost magically instilled in him. This was an angel visiting him.

"How do I get better?" Dirk asked.

"You have taken the first step by recognizing that you have a problem and believing in me."

"But what is the next step?" Dirk pleaded.

"Don't be too proud to ask for help."

"And remember, greater tasks await you and you will meet them all with grace and integrity."

Dirk had a feeling that the angel had to move on and help others, but asked"

"Wait, please, did you put the fortune on my desk?"

Dirk blinked, opened his eyes and the light was gone. He felt a little let down. Then, he once again heard the lovely laughter.

From that evening forward, Dirk decided that he would live life to his full potential. He decided to ask for help and to use the help he received to better himself and to help others. Dirk was filled with a new spirit, given to him by an angel of hope.


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